


Excuse me?

by Lisa Martin (LisaM)



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:40:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,114
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25675996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LisaM/pseuds/Lisa%20Martin
Summary: Xander gets teased.
Relationships: Spike/Xander Giles/Xander Spike/Giles
Kudos: 6





	Excuse me?

**Author's Note:**

> This story was first published in 'Love's Bitch' In October 2001. Zine by VisionQuestPress.

Research time again. Xander had stopped counting how many nights he had spent reading musty old books, getting a headache trying to read the weird language and an itchy nose from all the dust. Then again, he could now claim to know a little Latin, some Greek and certain expressions in various demonic languages. Not that it would help him get a job, but still it looked good on a resume. The Greek and Latin, that is.

He looked around the Magic Shop and sighed. At least the research place was new. He had to admit it, Giles had done a great job redecorating the shop. It looked..sophicated now, a far cry from the dark hole it used to be. He sighed again, recalling how previous owners had found their deaths in here. The last one had been found without his internal organs. He shivered at the thought. The case was never solved, but everyone here knew who was the killer. That demon/human/computer hybrid Adam. He was gone now, slain by the Scoobies. Then the owner before that, that lovely Wiccan lady. That had been a vampire attack. His gaze went to the corner of the room. He and Willow knew who the vampire was, the very same one who was now sitting in that corner, curled up in a chair, reading some obscure text. He shook his head, strange world they lived in. They were supposed to be fighting for the good side and here they were, in one room with a vampire and an ex vengeance demon. How many deaths they had on their conscience he could only guess at.

“Ow!” His thoughts were rudely interrupted by a poke in his ribs.

“Quit staring, Xander. We’ve got research to do.” Buffy gave him a grin, one he didn’t understand.

“Couldn’t just ask? Had to break my ribs?” He knew he sounded more offended than was appropriate, but hell, it hurt.

“I asked you three times already, fourth time is break ribs time.” Buffy’s smile never wavered.

“Yeah well, hold the Slayer power next time, okay?” Xander grumbled, while rubbing his side.

“If I had used that, those ribs would be broken,” Buffy chuckled.

“Oi! Stop that!”

All eyes in the room turned to Spike, who flashed a grin. “If there are ribs to be broken, I’m the one who’s doing the breakin’, luv.”

“Pff..” Buffy huffed. “Like you could. And don’t call me luv!”

Spike merely grinned and resumed his reading. Buffy let out a noise that was a mix of anger and annoyance and with one last glare at the vampire turned to her book again.

Willow scooted closer to Xander. After a few moments of staring, she nudged him gently. “Still bad?” she whispered.

“Who, Spike? Terrible,” Xander sighed, deliberately misunderstanding. Willow threw him a dark look. “Yeah,” he said with another sigh. “Having Spike around does help though. He doesn’t want any witnesses.”

“Especially not ones who could tear his throat out,” Willow nodded. “Oh sure, he can’t at the moment, but once that chip is gone…” she trailed off, shuddering at the thought.

“Now why would he do that? Spike, I mean.”

Another stare was sent his way, an incredulous one this time. “Because….well because…” Willow turned red. “Because I know what I would do if someone hurt Tara that way.”

“Yeah, so? Tara’s your girlfriend.” To Xander it made no sense whatsoever.

“W-w-what Willow is trying t-t-o say is that Spike would defend you to if he could,” Tara cut in.

“Why should he?” The moment the question left Xander’s mouth he grasped the meaning of Willow’s statement. “No!” he hissed. “Absolutely not! The thought alone makes me…eeuuw!”

“Oh come on Xander, you can tell us,” Willow smiled brightly.

“There is nothing to tell!!”

“You sure?” Willow was all pout now.

“Yes!!” It came out louder than anticipated and everyone stared at him. “Nothing to see folks,” he waved.

“Oh, but plenty to hear,” Buffy grinned. “Yeah Xand, give.”

“There is nothing to give..actually there is a lot to give, but not like that. I mean, not to him,” Xander rambled.

“Denial, denial.” Buffy shook her head.

“Bad Xander.” Anya emphasised her statement with a slap against Xander’s head.

“Hey! Have you all gone nuts??”

“No, just observant,” Willow giggled.

“Okay, just for the record. I have a girlfriend.” Xander couldn’t believe he was having this conversation.

“No, you don’t!” Anya said in a cheerful voice.

“I don’t??”

“Not since you’ve been sleeping with him.”

“I haven’t been…okay, this is a joke right?” Xander said, desperately wishing it was.

“Nope,” Buffy smiled.

Knowing only one other person who might get him out of this situation Xander turned to Giles, who shook his head. “I am not getting involved in this.”

Buffy’s face was all disgust. “Now that’s worthy of an EEEEIIIUWW!”

“Oh I can see it,” Anya said thoughtfully.

“You, girl, have a truly dirty mind,” Buffy replied with a shudder.

“That’s it.” Xander got to his feet. “I’m outta here. When you lot have returned to normal again, give me a call, okay?” He strode out, the sound of chuckles and giggles following him. He leaned against the wall, feeling exhausted, and waited.

Some fifteen minutes later, the door of the shop opened and Giles walked out. He smiled when he saw the younger man standing there.

“Think they bought it?” he grinned.

“I was so good, I almost believed it myself,” Xander smiled. “You coming, or what?”

“In a while. Have to lock the shop first.”

“Lock them in,” Xander suggested. “With Spike,” he added with a mischievous grin.

Giles grinned back. “Maybe another time. Tonight I have other plans.”

“Care to give a preview of those plans?”

“Can do better.” Giles closed in and kissed Xander.

“Oh boy,” Xander breathed when they parted. “Hurry, will you?”

A genuine Ripper grin was sent his way, the Giles walked back to the shop again.

Xander sagged against the wall and smiled. “Almost right girls, but not quite.”

“Bloody close, I’d say.”

“Let them,” Xander replied without looking at the owner of the voice. “Hey care to have a sample of what Ripper has in mind?” The next thing he knew a cool mouth descended on his, sucking the air out of his lungs. “Something like that,” he panted, coming up for air.

“Had a preview already,” Spike whispered, before breaking away and running off.

“Hey! Not fair!!” Xander yelled after him, a smile on his face. Life was good, he mused. Weird, but good. He pushed himself from the wall and wandered off in the direction of Giles’ house.


End file.
